Friday, October 15, 2021
Greetings, Dear Friends –
I pray you are experiencing the peace and love of God in very meaningful and tangible ways. Thank you for taking the time to read and reflect on this final article in our four-part series, “Am I Listening?” Part one of our series began with a focus on attention, then hearing and thirdly, understanding. We now examine part four, remembering.
If you recall, our working definition of listening is based upon the article by Richard Nordquist, “The Definition of Listening and How to Do It Well” (see reference below), which offers this meaning:
“the active process of receiving and responding to spoken (and sometimes unspoken) messages. It is one of the subjects studied in the field of language arts and in the discipline of conversation analysis.”
The article says remembering is the: “storing of meaningful information.” So, My Friend, what does this mean for us? How do we remember well?
An important part of our relationships is the way we communicate with each other. When we embrace and intentionally focus on effective and edifying communication, I believe we move beyond superficial relationships to those that are deeply connected. This is where another person can truly hear another’s heart—when we listen well. It has to be worth the investment for us to embark on this kind of a journey with another human being.
The old adage, “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never heart,” has not met nor grasped, among other Biblical texts, Ephesians 4:29 (The Holy Bible, ESV):
“Let not corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.”
Are our words seasoned with God’s grace? Hmmm…. Think about it.
Words matter! How do we want people to remember our encounter with them? People should feel better having had a conversation with us. They should be empowered and hopeful because we extend words of grace. Not that people will hang on and appreciate our every word, but we should be agents of God’s grace—even when it requires telling someone the truth in love.
Now, on to listening to remember!
There are times when someone might really need to talk—and consequently will need us to listen. Not to give advice, our thoughts and opinions, but just to be still and listen. In order to listen well, we choose to actively engage our minds and hearts as the other person speaks. We choose to listen actively in order to remember—i.e., store and recall what they are sharing. We listen to remember their situation empathetically. The person that is seeking to engage us needs to know that he or she matters—that we care enough to listen to them with an open heart and mind. We bring the fruit of the Spirit into the conversation and invite God to help us hear what we need to hear.
People need someone to talk to—especially now. The pandemic has created a new need as we all grapple with life as it is (and is becoming). The best gift we can give each other is to listen—without being judgmental, opinionated, or empty listeners. In us, should be a well springing up to provide water for thirsty souls. A well what is able to receive what another heart needs to share.
We listen—with attention; listen so we can hear; listen with understanding; listen to remember. This says that each of us is worth being heard. Each of our stories is worth being remembered. May the Lord give you His grace and a Divine opportunity to share in someone’s journey with ears to hear and remember!
I close with this final thought. We are grateful that God remembers us—that He hears our every cry and all that concerns us. Read this Word from Isaiah 65:24-
“Before they call I will answer; while they are yet speaking I will hear.”
Until next time, My Friend,
Selah
Source: Nordquist, Richard. “The Definition of Listening and How to Do It Well.” ThoughtCo, Aug. 26, 2020, thoughtco.com/listening-communication-term-1691247.